EASE

So, it's that time of year...a time to look back over the past year and forward to the next. Many make New Year's Resolutions for the coming year. I used to do this because I'm always trying to better myself. But over time I have begun to shy away from new year's resolutions because they generally don't work well for me and they just add unnecessary pressure to my life.

A few weeks ago though I stumbled across an idea that I really liked! Coming up with a word of intention for the year. Yes, a single word. I've been thinking on this a bit and decided that I wanted to give this a go. Then to choose a word...just one. hmmmm? Here is my short list of words I have been contemplating....

Compassion
Kindness
Prayerfulness
Ease
Joy
Peace
Savor
Shine
Authenticity
Flair
Beauty
Release
Simple
Spice
Fun

Good words huh? I like them! :) I have decided that my word for 2011 will be EASE. It may seem like an unusual word to use as a word of intention. It doesn't seem like a very goal oriented word, not a very empowering word and even a bit....well... lazy. Let me try to explain my reasoning for choosing it for myself.

As a child I tended to be a perfectionist. Yes tis true. I was the rule follower, the people pleaser, the halo wearer. My room was always clean. My grades were always good. I was the valedictorian of my high school class, not because I was the brightest student in my class...I wasn't, but I WAS the hardest worker in my class. I was a runner and I ran all summer...EVERY day of the summer. I always put pressure on myself to be the very best me that I could be.

Striving to reach goals is not a bad thing within reason. But, when taken to extremes it can be unhealthy and exhausting leaving you feeling rigid and stale.

In my twenties I had to figure out that Christianity is not about a bunch of rules to be followed. I had to rid myself of the feeling and idea that I had to be "good enough" to stay in good standing with my Lord. Wow! Talk about pressure! Christianity is not about checking off boxes.....You must do this, and This and THIS...blah!! What my Lord wants is me...a relationship with ME...Just as I am. He wants my undivided love, attention and affection. When that is there everything else falls into place naturally and with ease!

Over the years I have learned to stop being a perfectionist. Perfect is too hard. Ha! Life is not perfect. People are not perfect. Small people (ie children) are not perfect. ;) I've let go of many of my perfectionist ways. Whew!

But, I continue to be a list maker, a doer, a scheduler. My life is busy, as most of our lives are. I have things I want to DO....good things. How can I do them all and do them well? I don't want to allow the good to be drowned out by the unimportant and petty. I do put pressure on myself to do the right things and make the right choices. To get things done. Things often tend to be black and white for me and I can easily miss the other beautiful hues and colors if I'm not aware and careful.

I've recently come across this quote: "We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses" ~ Carl Jung~

That's interesting isn't it? Change can not happen until we accept where we're at. In other words stop trying so hard. Just be. Change will happen naturally.

This is a picture of a Chinese finger trap. The more you pull and pull and try to get out the more trapped your fingers become. You can only get out be easing the tension.

I think that's what I need to do with life. It doesn't need to be such a struggle. I need to quit trying so hard and just BE. I plan and schedule and work and work and work to the point where I'm frustrated. I'm trying too hard. I often feel like I am white knuckling it....with the budget, with the schedule, with the "to do" list, with my goals, with the parenting, with my diet.  I need to "Let Go and Let God" . I need to EASE up on my expectations of myself and just BE. Let life happen naturally and with ease. Let change occur naturally and with ease.

So that is my word for the year..... EASE. I'm looking forward to seeing where this mind set will take me.

Happy 2011.

Love,
Wendy

Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday James!

We had a GREAT day yesterday! Grandma and I insisted on a group shot. It was met by a bit of resistance by a few, but we got one good click of the camera and this was it. Not too bad for a haphazard shot. ;) That is my nephew Ethan (Fred's son) tucked in the back there. What a sweet surprise it was to see him pull up in the drive way yesterday! YAY!!!! :) That is Tom's Granny right behind Gracie and of course, Grandma and Grandpa Dick and James.

Here are a few photos from our day. Isaac got a pumpmaster 760 BB Gun. Notice the box says "Take It Outside" Heeeellllooooo...PLEASE DO!! lol! ;)

Tom made Heidi a beautiful Hope Chest! Don't have any good shots of it right now. I'll save that for another post. ;) Here she is opening it up. We had it covered in blankets. Notice Isaac in this shot though....they say "take it outside" on the box for a reason apparently...sigh......... ;)

My little sweetheart! She was so very happy and excited about Christmas! She spent all last week filling the underneath of our tree with lots of Gracie made gifts and cards. Don't know what I'd do without her joy! It's contagious!

Granny said that Jacob got the best gift of the day! She's right! :)

Ethan and Isaac wrestling ;)

Yesterday was James' birthday. Yes, Christmas Day. He turned 17.

Heidi made him a birthday cookie. With all the commotion going on yesterday I did not realize that he was actually eating the cookie before we sang to him and did the candle. So, I didn't get a picture of the full cookie. And, we did the candle with only half of his birthday cookie. lol! I guess we know he liked the cookie! ;)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMES!!! We love you and we are very proud of you!

Love,

Wendy

Christmas, Christmas time is near...

......time for toys and time for cheer! Love this time of year! We've had so much fun this week!!! Here is some of the fun in pictures! :)

Our Christmas tree! Pay special attention to the tree skirt. My eyes fill with tears as I look at it. I'm so thrilled to have it. This tree skirt was made by my Grandma Connell. She was a wonderful seastress! Grandma passed away in 2003, but this is the first year that our family has been blessed with this tree skirt made by Grandma. I received a package several weeks ago from my Grandma's cousin, Bob. Bob lives in Port Huron Michigan. He and Grandma were very close. This tree skirt was made by Grandma for Bob. He has enjoyed it as part of his Christmas decor for many years. Bob decided to bless our family with this tree skirt because he knows how much we loved Grandma and he knows that we will treasure it always!!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart Bob!!!!

This little village belonged to Tom's Granny. Granny is now 91 years old...a very spunky 91 I might add. :) She will be here later today to spend Christmas with us. :) She gave us this village a few years ago. It too shall be treasured.

Heidi Jo baked all the sugar cookies this year...bless her heart! She kept us all quite entertained while doing so...hee hee! She was talking to the dough. ;) It wasn't always doing what she wanted it to do. Ha!

Gracie got in on the fun too!

 We all got in on the decorating part...well, except for James. We saved the cookie decorating part for while he was here because he enjoys doing it. He ended up spending the time on the couch. :( He's feeling better now though! YAY!

Caught ya Mister Man! ;)

Love it! :)

Well, I had several more pictures that I wanted to post, but blogger is telling me that I'm done......well, actually it's my internet that is the problem. Too many folks on right now and it won't let me do what I want to do. More photos would likely be a bit overwhelming anyway. Tom and the boys just left to fetch Granny. The girls and I need to get busy with last minute things. I hope that you are all basking in the love of family and friends this Christmas.

Love, Wendy

The Secret

My friend, Deb, sent this to me via email a few days ago. This idea has been on my mind a lot lately...the idea of living in the moment. I posted about it here on my blog a few weeks ago. This is another good reminder. I hope you all are savoring the moments of this wonderful season with your family and friends. So, I'm not sure who wrote it, but it is definitely worth sharing! God Bless! I hope you all have a great day TODAY...right NOW! :)
Love, Wendy

The Secret

Her name was Sam. And we were seated at the same table for the Chamber Choir’s Madrigal Feast. She was beautiful. Not necessarily in appearance, but in spirit. Externally, you would have noticed plain brown hair, average height, little makeup, simple clothes. But then Sam started talking to us. Her beautiful British accent flitting across the table as her eyes sparkled. When she smiled it wasn’t just with her mouth but with her whole being. We were all instantly drawn to her.



As we waited for the performance to begin Sam kept a running commentary. The food… delectable. The Wassail… divine. The décor… stunning. Her assessment of our evening influenced each of us around the table. Then suddenly a hush fell across the room and Sam grew silent. Slowly the Chamber Choir began their processional singing acapella of the Christ Child and a manger.


As their voices filled the air my attention was once again drawn to Sam. Her eyes were closed, face upturned and slightly tilted, a single tear made its way across her cheek. Completely unashamed she sat fully immersed in the emotion of the moment. In a word she was radiant.


And as I watched He whispered to me “she knows the secret”.


The secret of being fully engaged. Of living, embracing, savoring every moment. The secret of joy.


She was not aware of time, or schedules, or urgent emails waiting to be answered. She was not worried about bills needing to be paid, or concerned about her child’s grades. She was simply, completely there. In that moment. Focused. Enjoying.


And I was jealous. I wanted to feel her joy. Experience her rapture. Join her in abandonment. But I simply could not silence all of the other voices in my mind. Like icy winds they whipped through my mind. Schedules, deadlines, lists, chores.


I want to be more like Sam. I want to silence the voices that aim to distract me. I want to revel in beauty. Get lost in joy. Be swept up in wonder. Enjoy the moment.


And so… I shall.

Taste and see that the Lord is good. Psalm 34:

Day 1 of Christmas Break..yeeeehawwww!!

I was awoken on my first day of Christmas break by the sounds of someone pilfering through my sewing box which is being temporarily housed in my bedroom due to Christmas festivities taking it's normal position in the living room. As I rubbed the sand from my eyes I saw Isaac standing in the darkness with a loooong strand of thread trailing from his hand. He was fully clothed in blue jeans with a nice button up shirt neatly tucked into his blue jeans.

Mom: Honey, what are you doing?
Isaac: I'm gonna sew a button on this shirt.

Mom: Why are you wearing that shirt??

Isaac: Because I want to look nice when I go to Carter's today.
Mom: Oh.....

Just for your info...this conversation took place at approximately 6 a.m. He is going to Carter's at 1. Apparently going to Carter's house to romp in the snow is the most important event in Isaac life to date because up until now Isaac has never under his own free will cared to "look nice"!!! lol! By the time I stumbled out of bed and made it to the living room we were a bit discouraged with this:

We managed to find a button that was the right size, although not quite the right color. I think it'll do for a romp in the snow. ;) I got it on the shirt for him, but let me take this opportunity to say...WHY are they making needle eyes so small these days?? I know they are getting smaller and smaller!! It certainly can't be me that is changing. It has to be the needles! ha!  Audrey, if the importance of this event in Isaac's mind matched up to his attire he would be arriving today in a tux. :) You'll have to settle for a sweet little boy in a sweet little shirt with one button that is slightly off color. :)

My first day at home will be filled with wrapping and baking. And last night Heidi declared that we should see if we can go a whole day without the car leaving the driveway! WOW!! When a 17 year old suggests that ya better take her up on it. :)

Thank you Audrey for inviting Isaac and thank you as well for "driving the bus" today making the goal of my wheels not hitting the pavement at least a possibility!

Love,

Wendy

SEVENTEEN!!!!

Yes, you read that right. On Friday we celebrated Miss Heidi Jo's 17th birthday. WOW!! I keep thinking that I will soon get used to the idea that she will be graduating from high school next year, but it still has not sunk in for me. Although milestones keep happening indicating that it must be true. She really is now 17!! The above photo was taken last Friday before the Winterfest Dance. Heidi is growing up into a beautiful young lady both inside and out. Enjoy the next few years baby girl. They are gonna sail by!!

The past couple years we have kind of gotten away from birthday cakes and instead done birthday treats. Cakes seem to sit around here for quite a while until we throw them out. So, this year Heidi wanted these special cookies from the bakery where I grew up...Jonesville bakery. They were a hit when I was a kid and they still make them exactly the same. Grandma and Grandpa Dick picked them up for her on their way through on Friday. Heidi enjoyed them for sure! :) Well...we all did! ;)YUM!!

Grandma also made Heidi a pan of brownies! Thank you Grandma!

A big Hershey's kiss from James

I love you to the moon and back sweet girl!!!

I Hope You Dance!!!

Love,

Mom

Saying Goodbye to David

On Thursday December 2, 2010 my cousin, David Grantham, passed away unexpectedly. He was only 41 years old. He leaves behind a beautiful wife, Dhel, and two small children...Rodney, age 3 and Jasmine 14 months. David was currently serving in Louisiana in the Army. Dhel is from the Philippines and she and David had just moved to the states from a tour in South Korea two years ago. David was an awesome husband and father! The love he had for his family was so very evident! This will be extremely hard for Dhel. Please keep her and the children in your prayers. David's funeral will take place on Friday Dec. 10 in Tulsa. I'm hoping that I will be able to attend, but I'm not sure just yet. Our families were quite close as children. So, all of the cousins spent quite a bit of time together. I'm still finding it very hard to believe that he is actually gone. That's how death is. It always makes you stop and remember what is truly important! We must love our Lord with all our heart, soul and mind and we must  love one another and we must do it NOW! I've been looking at David's facebook page the past two days. If you are familiar with facebook you know that on your profile they provide an opportunity for you to put your favorite quotes. David put just one favorite quote and it was "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". If we could all always live by this one simple principle wouldn't this world be a much better place!

Family was important to Dave. He made an effort to stay connected. Every now and then out of the blue he would call. When he did it was like old times.....like we had just talked the day before. I've never personally met his wife Dhel, but I've talked to her on the phone because Dave would call to shoot the breeze for a bit and have to run into the store or something like that and put Dhel on to talk to me while he was gone. lol! My most recent coversation with him was him asking me if I knew that there was a news reporter on ESPN by the name Wendy Nicks (my maiden name). When I informed him that we don't get cable he proceeded to give me a hard time about living out in the boondocks. ;)

Last Christmas.

Very proud Daddy!

You will be missed!! We love you!!!

Love, Wendy

The Teen Years Begin

Yes, tis true.....Jacob is officially a teenager. His birthday was on Thanksgiving Day. So, we were able to celebrate with a huge turkey dinner with all the fixins and lots of family. :)  Jacob has definitely entered a new phase of life, although I'll have to say this phase actually started a tad before his birthday. lol! It's a well known fact that the teen years can be quite tumultuous. I understand that and accept it. Yes, sometimes I want to say, "WHO are you and what have you done with my son!" Well...truth be told I've been thinking that quite often lately! ;)  But, a little bit of tumultuousness is necessary in life don't ya think? It makes the sweet moments even sweeter. And, Jacob has a whole heck of a lot of sweetness and compassion in his bones!! And, his bones are growing by leaps and bounds these days too. So, I expect his compassion, sweetness and maturity will grow right along with his stature. In a blink of an eye all of the tumult shall end and he will emerge a strong, mature man of God......(I'm trusting you on this Lord!! ;)  This time too shall pass....and it shall pass way too quickly for this Mama!! So, I shall savor this time with my boy!!!! I shall savor it. I shall savor this awkward time between boyhood and manhood......the sweet moments....along with the tumultuous ones. This is it! We will never get this time back. This Mama loves you with the same zest and gusto that exudes from your very core Jacob Robert!!! Enjoy your teenage years my boy!! I know I will!

His favorite birthday gift. ;)